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| Subject: my husband withdrew to bring me to canada |
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I got married to this man 3 years ago while he came to visit his family. He promised me that he will take me to canada and live and form a family. When we met I was in collage (graduate studies). He wanted me to stop everything and wait for my visa. After 3 years I got a very sad and disturbing news. He withdrew the application without notifying me. He is in Canada and I am in Africa. I am extremely heart broken, betrayed, depressed and sick. I heard he wants to get married to another women. What do I do, what are my rights.
[08-10-2009,04:11]
[**.216.62.167]
lina |
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(in reply to: my husband withdrew to bring me to canada)
for immigration - none. as for marriage rights - you need to use your countries divorce laws.
[08-10-2009,06:05]
[***.5.54.139]
Sharon |
(in reply to: my husband withdrew to bring me to canada)
This is soo sad..what an senseless bastard..he deserves to burn in hell and trust me he will.God doesnt let these kind of things get unpunished.Please dont get yourself down for someone like this ( I cant even call him "someone" because person that could do such a thing doesnt have a gram of humanity in himself ).I know you have basicaly lost 3 years in waiting and hoping every day.But plz dont get down about it,there could have been worse things then that.I could name you one I heard about,The American guy that sponsored a girl from Russia and 2 yrs later he killed her because he was so jelous of her! ( this was on the news few yrs ago )! Regarding the immigration i think you cant do nothing about it,if you can afford I would suggest you get lawyer ( at least for advice )!I know that revenge is not the best option,but if this happened to me I would at least try to make his life miserable,,so he can feel how i felt,If only for a moment!...
[08-10-2009,09:45]
[**.95.63.198]
Jane |
(in reply to: my husband withdrew to bring me to canada)
Jane and Sharon, Thank you for your support and advise. what would do me getting a lawyer. Do I hire a lawyer from Canada?
Can he get married again without divorcing me? I also heard some of his friends did the same thing to others, and I really want to stop this people from taking advantage of poor African girls. They are using poor women like me and taking advantage of our body, dignity, virginity and moral. Please help:
[08-10-2009,19:44]
[**.216.88.113]
lina |
(in reply to: my husband withdrew to bring me to canada)
what would be the objective of hiring a lawyer?
first thing - was it a government marriage or a religious marriage - and what is legally recognized in your home country. What is the process for divorce in your home country. You have no divorce jurisdiction in Canada. He would have to file for divorce in the country where you were married. I would suggest you file for divorce where you are and try to get on with your life as best you can.
As far as retribution - there is no point. It will not get you back your 3 years or save the heartbreak and humiliation. It also won´t punish him. Let it go.
He may likely try and marry without divorcing you. He may or may not get caught and I am not sure what you could even do to stop him. I doubt that hiring a lawyer in Canada would change anything.
The only way to prevent it from happening is to tell your story so others are cautious.
[08-10-2009,20:54]
[***.5.54.139]
Sharon |
(in reply to: my husband withdrew to bring me to canada)
Thank you Sharon We had religious and legal marriage which is also legally recognized in Canada, that is why immigration Canada allow me to apply.
I am also planning to start a campaign and liaise government officials. To tell you the truth there are lots of young women with similar problems and they can not speak out for them selves due to education, language and cultural burden. This men are locals who immigrated to Canada. My so called husband told me he had a very good job and education, but I found out he did not even complete high school.
As to me I will follow your suggestion and will continue with my life. Thank you again
[08-10-2009,22:30]
[**.216.88.113]
lina |
(in reply to: my husband withdrew to bring me to canada)
I would not waste energy with Canadian officials. In the eyes of Canadian law, no crime was committed.
However, in your own country, was any crime committed? If not, again what is the purpose beyond helping you to feel a little less betrayed (which I 100% appreciate).
The truth is that women (and men) need to walk in to ANY relationship with their eyes wide open. There is no law to provide caution and common sense.
[08-10-2009,23:01]
[***.5.54.139]
Sharon |
revenge is sweet (in reply to: my husband withdrew to bring me to canada)
I don´t understad the "turn the other cheek" attitude. The guy was a creep, and if he re-marries in Canada, without first divorcing the duped wife, this will show up in some registry or other. Then you show proof of prior marriage and the guy is caught for bigamy -- a serious crime in Canada.
How to do all this? Consult a lawyer in Canada.
[25-10-2009,08:21]
[***.131.182.225]
Toby |
(in reply to: my husband withdrew to bring me to canada)
Toby, what does ANY of that help HER - none. It does not return her dignity, does not get her into Canada, does not restore her broken heart. If there is some sort of registry, all it would do is render the second marriage null and void.
She should find a way to divorce the guy and be done with it. That is the only thing that will help HER
[25-10-2009,13:09]
[***.5.54.139]
Sharon |
(in reply to: my husband withdrew to bring me to canada)
There is nothing to stop her from seeking a divorce in her homeland - abandonment, common.
[25-10-2009,21:45]
[**.210.15.78]
Anonymous |
(in reply to: my husband withdrew to bring me to canada)
absolutely, and that is what she should do. Leave the punishment part to God.
[26-10-2009,00:07]
[***.5.54.139]
Sharon |
