oh please?? HELP?!?!

Canada Immigration Forum (discussion group)

Subject: oh please?? HELP?!?!
  So.... I don´t know quite where to start, but, here goes.
I had been living in Canada, not working, with my then bf, now husband, from 2006 - 2010. I returned to the US frequently enough to be within the 6 mo. limit MOSTLY, but with each re-entry I grew more nervous.
In Maybe, 2010, I was on my way home from my last trip to the US.
We were meeting in Niagra Falls.
We were pretty poor at the time (well, still are, but it´s all relative...) and still, he scraped his money together to rent the ´Presidential Suite´ at one of the big hotels overlooking the falls.
The room had a hot tub in it.
He was going to propose to me that night.
Instead, I was denied entry at the border and it was, will be, one of the worst, loneliest most desperate nights of my life.
It is now 2 years later.
I have been living with my parents, first my mom, now my dad.
I am 37. I want a baby with this man I love.
He FINALLY got a good, stable job and the ´application for sponsorship´ process can BEGIN.
I was refused entry originally because I had Waaay too much stuff with me than I should have had for the "two days" response I blurted when he asked "how long will you be visiting?"
...that´s how long I was staying in NIAGRA and my mind just....
and then, when I tried ´explaining´ it just got worse and worse.
My fiance was called and since we had made no "plan" in case of such, he had no way of ´corroborating me´.
So? I was refused.
But? I was charged with nothing, and.... I just want to go home.
Can anyone help?
Is there a way to find out if I will be allowed back in without making the hard/expensive journey just to be denied?
If I DO get to the border should I TELL the agent that I am married to a Canadian??
I am only JUST starting the ´sponsorship application´ - my medical exam is booked for next week - but???
Can I get into Canada and do it from THERE? - I know I might not be able to LEAVE Canada for awhile, but? that is FINE!

I don´t have money for a lawyer, I miss my husband so very much... my home. my life. it has been TWO YEARS.... I am 37... I want babies....
can you help me?

I thank you so much for any help you can offer.


Zoe Fine
(in reply to: oh please?? HELP?!?!)

Your chances of re-entering Canada are very slim. You don´t appear to be a genuine visitor. A visitor is supposed to leave Canada at the end of the visit your entire travel history and plans aren´t going to work.

You still have an option though. Your husband can still sponsor you while you are down in the US and he can either live with you down there until the process is done OR he can stay up here OR he can live up here and visit you until the process is done. Either way, you have to wait in the US.

The only safe way for you to be able to return to Canada, would be as a Permanent Resident.

The application has to be processed while you are OUTSIDE of Canada. I don´t recommend an inland application and don´t bother trying to cross the border. The officer can see that you were refused of entry before and things can go south pretty quick again because your circumstances haven´t changed.

Reply to the oh please?? HELP?!?! (in reply to: oh please?? HELP?!?!)
Thank you SO much... though... it is certainly NOT the news I was hoping to hear.
Just to hear from someone... ANYONE... who has any idea of what we should DO is a huge relief.
(Yaaaay internet, and... How could I have not thought of this earlier????)
And?... I KNOW the customs agent would see I was refused... but... I was refused for? Lying?
It is now two years later, I can not tell the agent that I am now MARRIED to that Canadian and am applying for my PR card?
How WOULD one do it from ´inside the country´ without either A) saying just that, or B) Lying and saying they are ´only visiting´ when they enter?
There is NO way he can come live here (it took SO long for him to find his steady job....) and?
we are too poor for visits more frequent than every 6 months.
It is... really... just terrible, and very hard, and incredible to me that it is SO difficult as a US citizen trying to live with her man in Canada.

OK, so, keep my US Dr. appointment and ....
just keep swimming...

I thank you again, so much, for your help.

Zoe Fine
(in reply to: oh please?? HELP?!?!)
Skype, webcam... the days will go by faster than you think. Take DocD´s advice.
(in reply to: oh please?? HELP?!?!)
hahaha.... skype?....
I did mention it has been Two years of living without him, yes?...
I know EXACTLY how fast the days go.
Skype is pretty crappy when you want to get pregnant.
but thanks!
I shall indeed heed Docs advice, I just wish there was any other option.

Zoe Fine
(in reply to: oh please?? HELP?!?!)
a gentle word of advice - you don´t want to get pregnant until that sponsorship visa is in your hands and you are assured of the outcome you want. From health care, to custody, to being together, to what happens if the application is rejected -

really and truly... just wait. lots of time for babies.

(in reply to: oh please?? HELP?!?!)
I second Sharon´s advice.

Another word of caution and some tough love. Don´t play the "it´s so hard to be together" card with immigration. It´s not that hard. The reason why it´s so hard for YOU is because you and your husband have made poor choices. You need to take responsibility for that and do the right thing now. CIC is not your babysitter.

Based on the information you have provided, you could have applied as common law back in 2007. You didn´t. Now you´re living with the consequences.

I wouldn´t try crossing the border again until your PR application has been submitted and your husband has been approved as your sponsor. You could take a chance then (no guarantee it will work). If you do, bring proof that you have submitted the application, paid all fees and that your husband has been approved to sponsor. If asked, assure immigration that you understand you are not allowed to live in Canada until you have PR and that you will follow visitor rules and leave the country when/if you have to. Absolutely avoid using phrases such as "I´m going home" in reference to Canada. It´s not your home. You´re not allowed to live. Phrases such as this are red flags for border officials.

Good luck.

(in reply to: oh please?? HELP?!?!)
So, ok.... I am hearing loud and clear, ´stop whining´ and press on.
It´s a crappy feeling to be ´homeless´, all your belongings, your husband, your world on the other side of some border, but yes, I understand I am not ´special´ or ´entitled´ to certain privileges.
I was just wondering if I could apply from inside the country.
However Anonymous, I contest greatly that it, Canada, is "not my home. you´re not allowed to live" (there?... I am hoping.)
It sure feels like it, and I am working Very hard to return to it.
So, I shall take your advice and edit those words from my vocabulary when speaking to ANYONE official, and I thank you for telling me.

Zoe Fine
(in reply to: oh please?? HELP?!?!)
Yes - sorry - dropped the "there".

In your heart, Canada may be your home. Legally, it isn´t. Make sure you talk and act according to the legal situation when dealing with boarder officials - not what you feel.

I sponsored my American husband several years ago and completely understand the "what you feel" vs. legal situation divide. My best advice is to set your feelings aside, familiarize yourself with the rules, and follow them. If you think of Canada as your home, you will probably act like Canada is your home (subconsciously) when dealing with people like immigration officials. These are the red flags they look for.

One final point: I would recommend you submit an outland application (not inland). Outland is generally much faster for Americans and you can appeal if refused.

(in reply to: oh please?? HELP?!?!)
I know of one guy zho can help , his address is angellottiferres@yahoo.com
paulo cesar
(in reply to: oh please?? HELP?!?!)
For more info: